[Quote:]

An Ordering of Integers.

Montague, A stack to hold the array.
The Ghost, a temporary stack.
Lennox, size of the full dataset.
Romeo, size of Montague.
Hamlet, gap size.
Ulysses, swapped.
Duncan, for i < Duncan.
Dorcas, i.
Juliet, Return value/Argument.
Cassius, an index argument.
Antonio, a.
Arthur, b.
Angelo, a call stack.
Titus, a temporary.

Act I: The final insult.

Scene I: A strange conversation to setup the plot.

[Enter Montague and Titus]

Montague:
Thou art nothing!

Titus:
Remember me. Thou art a large purple flower. Remember thyself.

Montague:
Thou art a cute chihuahua.

Titus:
Remember me. Thou art the difference between an old small rural town and a cow! Remember thyself!

Montague:
Thou art the SUM of an old small rural town and a cow!

Titus:
Remember me. Thou art the difference between me and the difference between the square of a red rose and a lantern! Remember thyself.

Montague:
You hairy disgusting smelly toad! Thou art the
difference between nothing and thyself!

Titus:
Remember me. Thou art the difference between the square of a beautiful summer's day and an angel. Remember thyself. Thou art the sum of a charming king and thyself. Remember thyself. Thou art the sum of thyself and a hair. Remember thyself. Thou art a joy! Remember thyself.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Lennox and Romeo]

Lennox:
You are the difference between nothing and a large disgusting
horrid goat. You are the sum of an old red rose and thyself.
You are the difference between thyself and a nose.

Romeo:
You are like me.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Angelo and Titus]

Titus:
You are a red pony. Remember yourself. Let us proceed to scene IV.

Scene II: we're ready to sort.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Titus and Angelo]

Angelo:
You are the sum of a red pony and a door.

Titus:
Remember me. Let us proceed to scene VII.

Scene III: all done.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Titus]

Titus:
We must proceed to scene XX.

Scene IV: Montague bares all.

[Exeunt]
[Enter The Ghost and Montague]

The Ghost:
Recall the joys of youth. Open your heart.

Montague:
Remember me.

The Ghost:
You are a bold brave happy fine noble hero. Speak your mind.

[Exit Montague]
[Enter Romeo]

The Ghost:
You are the difference between thyself and a brother. Are you
as good as nothing?

Romeo:
If not, we must return to scene IV.
You are the sum of a large red fellow and a big normal furry
roman. Speak your mind! You are the sum of thyself and a
door. Speak your mind!

Scene V: The restoration of Montague's station.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Romeo and Lennox]

Romeo:
Am I as good as you?

Lennox:
If so, we must proceed to scene VI.

[Exeunt]
[Enter The Ghost and Montague]

Montague:
Recall the blue skies of Jamaca.

The Ghost:
Remember me.

[Exit The Ghost]
[Enter Romeo]

Montague:
You are the sum of thyself and a brother.

[Exit Montague]
[Enter Lennox]

Romeo:
Am I as good as you?

Lennox:
If not, we must return to scene V. If so, we must proceed to
scene VI.

Scene VI: Return up the call stack.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Angelo and Titus]

Titus:
Recall your origins.

Angelo:
Am I as good as a pony?

Titus:
If so, we must return to scene XXI.

Angelo:
Am I as good as a red pony?

Titus:
If so, we must return to scene II.

Angelo:
Am I as good as the sum of a red pony and a door?

Titus:
If so, we must return to scene III.

Angelo:
Am I as good as a big red pony?

Titus:
If so, we must return to scene X.

Angelo:
Am I as good as the sum of a big red pony and a chihuahua?

Titus:
If so, we must return to scene XI.

Angelo:
Am I as good as the sum of a big red pony and a furry
chihuahua?

Titus:
If so, we must return to scene XII.

Angelo:
Am I as good as the difference between a big cute red pony and a chihuahua?

Titus:
If so, we must return to scene XIII.

Scene VII: The real fun begins.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Hamlet and Lennox]

Lennox:
You are like me.

Scene VIII: The big loop.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Hamlet and Titus]

Hamlet:
You are the square of a furry happy chihuahua. You are the
difference between thyself and a red rose. You are the
sum of thyself and a hound.

Titus:
You are the product of thyself and the sum of a large furry
cute roman and a normal morning. You are the quotient between
thyself and me.

Hamlet:
Am I worse than a door?

Titus:
If so, you are a door.

[Exit Hamlet]
[Enter Ulysses]

Titus:
You are nothing.

[Exit Ulysses]
[Enter Duncan]

Titus:
You are the difference between Lennox and Hamlet.

[Exit Duncan]
[Enter Dorcas]

Titus:
You are nothing.

Scene IX: The inner loop.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Cassius and Angelo]

Angelo:
You are like Dorcas.

Cassius:
You are a big red pony. Remember yourself. We must proceed
to scene XVI.

Scene X: Return with the first item.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Cassius and Antonio]

Cassius:
You are like Juliet.

[Exit Antonio]
[Enter Dorcas]

Dorcas:
You are like me. You are the sum of yourself and Hamlet.

[Exit Dorcas]
[Enter Angelo]

Cassius:
You are the sum of a big red pony and a chihuahua. Remember
yourself. We must proceed to scene XVI.

Scene XI: Return with the second item.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Arthur and Juliet]

Juliet:
You are like me.

[Exit Juliet]
[Enter Antonio]

Antonio:
Am I better than you?

Arthur:
If not, we must proceed to scene XIV.

[Exit Antonio]
[Enter Ulysses]

Arthur:
You are a pony.

[Exit Ulysses]
[Enter Juliet]

Arthur:
You are like me.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Cassius and Dorcas]

Dorcas:
You are like me.

[Exit Dorcas]
[Enter Angelo]

Cassius:
You are the sum of a big red pony and a furry chihuahua.
Remember yourself. We must proceed to scene XVIII.

Scene XII: return from the first replacement.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Cassius and Dorcas]

Dorcas:
You are like me. You are the sum of thyself and Hamlet.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Juliet and Antonio]

Antonio:
You are like me.

[Exit Juliet]
[Enter Angelo]

Antonio:
You are the difference between a cute big red pony and a
chihuahua. Remember yourself. We must proceed to scene XVIII.

Scene XIII: return from the second replacement.

[Exeunt]

Scene XIV: bottom of the inner loop.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Dorcas and Duncan]

Duncan:
You are the sum of yourself and a rose.

Dorcas:
Am I worse than you?

Duncan:
If so, we must return to scene IX.

Dorcas:
Is Ulysses as good as nothing?

Duncan:
If so, let us proceed to scene XV. If not, we must return to scene
VIII.

Scene XV: We didn't swap.

Dorcas:
Is Hamlet as good as a pony?

Duncan:
If so, let us proceed to scene XX.

Dorcas:
We must return to scene VIII.

Scene XVI: Retrieve an item.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Romeo and Cassius]

Cassius:
Am I as good as the difference between Lennox and you?

Romeo:
If so, we must proceed to scene XVII.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Montague and The Ghost]

The Ghost:
Recall the glories of old.

Montague:
Remember me.

[Exit Montague]
[Enter Romeo]

The Ghost:
You are the difference between yourself and a father. We must
return to scene XVI.

Scene XVII: we found it.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Montague and Juliet]

Juliet:
Recall that one time in band camp.

Montague:
You are like me.

Juliet:
Remember me. We must proceed to scene V.

Scene XVIII: In Montague, replace Bianca with Juliet.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Romeo and Cassius]

Cassius:
Am I as good as the difference between Lennox and you?

Romeo:
If so, we shall proceed to Scene XIX.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Montague and The Ghost]

The Ghost:
Recall the drama of Jiva.

Montague:
Remember me.

[Exit Montague]
[Enter Romeo]

The Ghost:
You are the difference between yourself and a niece. We must
return to scene XVIII.

Scene XIX: we found it.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Montague and Juliet]

Juliet:
Recall that special shade of red. Remember me. We must
proceed to scene V.

Scene XX: print and exit.

[Exeunt]
[Enter Angelo and Titus]

Titus:
Thou art a pony. Remember thyself. Let us proceed to scene IV.

Scene XXI: Fin.

[Exeunt]


This video has been recorded in Falluja in early Janury, 2005, when the city was reopened to civilians after the American attack of November 8th, 2004

(warning, graphic images)

(again, for non-Dutch readers, a summary)

[Quote:]

European leaders may have to scrap the proposed EU constitution after Dutch voters rejected it by a massive margin, voicing their concern over dwindling national identity in a rapidly expanding union and their distrust of increasingly powerful bureaucrats.

The outcome in the Netherlands from the referendum Wednesday – three days after a similar vote in France – was likely to halt the European momentum, which had been welcomed by some as creating a new world power but disdained by others as smothering their cultures in a vast superstate.

With 99.8 percent of the ballots counted, unofficial results showed 61.6 percent voted “nee,” while 38.4 percent said “ja.” The level of opposition and the turnout of 63 percent exceeded all projections.

Prime Minister Jan Peter Balkenende conceded defeat Wednesday night and said his government would accept the will of the people.

Parliament, which has the final say on ratification because the referendum was nonbinding, meets on Thursday to debate the results.

Balkenende acknowledged the huge gap that has emerged between the politicians and the electorate.

“The idea of Europe has lived for the politicians, but not the Dutch people. That will have to change,” he said. “We will need to bring across the message that there are doubts here about the fast pace of change, the Dutch identity and other, financial, concerns.”

The vote was seen by some as symbolic of an introverted attitude by the Dutch in recent years as they struggle do deal with issues such as integration, a shrinking economy and fears over Islamic radicalism.

It was the first vote held in the Netherlands on the Dutch involvement with Europe, and opponents spoke of a breakthrough for European democracy. The extent of the opposition was a shock to the political establishment, which campaigned for the charter until the final hours of voting.

The treaty must have the backing of all 25 member states to enter into force in 2006. But with the clear rejections by two founding EU members this week, there seemed no hope for salvaging the constitution in its present form.

“The verdict of these referendums now raises profound questions for all of us about the future direction of Europe,” British Foreign Secretary Jack Straw said in London.

Gerrie Elfrink, a young Socialist Party city council member said politicians had conceived Europe behind closed doors without consulting the people.

“We in Holland, we feel Dutch. We want to work together with France, Germany and England. But we want to be Dutch. Europe exists only in the minds of politicians in Brussels,” he said.

“This is the first time in decades we could say something and we said, ‘It’s gone too far.’”

Harry van Bommel, who led the “no” campaign for the Socialist Party, was cheered by hundreds of revelers as he arrived at celebrations in Amsterdam. “It’s the people � who for 50 years had to keep quiet about the direction, structure and future of Europe � who won tonight.”

Geert Wilders, a right-wing member of parliament whose tough line on immigration has attracted many former Fortuyn voters, said he was “incredibly happy that the Dutch voter has rubbed it in the faces of the political elite in The Hague and Brussels.”

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: Thanks. I’m setting up an office in my den and I’m thinking about buying a computer.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: No, the name’s Lou.
ABBOTT: Your computer?

COSTELLO: I don’t own a computer. I want to buy one.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: I told you, my name’s Lou.
ABBOTT: What about Windows?
COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
COSTELLO: I don’t know. What will I see when I look in the windows?
ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for Windows?
COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What have you got?
ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
ABBOTT: I just did.
COSTELLO: You just did what?
ABBOTT: Recommend something.
COSTELLO: You recommended something?

ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: For my office?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!
ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.
COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, lets just say I’m sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

ABBOTT: Word.
COSTELLO: What word?
ABBOTT: Word in Office.
COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.
ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?
ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue “W”.
COSTELLO: I’m going to click your blue “w” if you don’t start with some straight answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch movies on the Internet?
ABBOTT: Yes, you want Real One.

COSTELLO: Maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is none of your business. Just tell me what I need!
ABBOTT: Real One.
COSTELLO: If it’s a long movie I also want to see reel 2, 3 & 4. Can I watch them?
ABBOTT: Of course.
COSTELLO: Great! With what?
ABBOTT: Real One.
COSTELLO: OK, I’m at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do?
ABBOTT: You click the blue “1″.

COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?
ABBOTT: The blue “1″.
COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue w?
ABBOTT: The blue “1″ is Real One and the blue “W” is Word.
COSTELLO: What word?
ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: But there’s three words in “office for windows”!
ABBOTT: No, just one. But it’s the most popular Word in the world.
COSTELLO: It is?

ABBOTT: Yes, but to be fair, there aren’t many other Words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words out there.
COSTELLO: And that word is real one?
ABBOTT: Real One has nothing to do with Word. Real One isn’t even part of Office.
COSTELLO: STOP! Don’t start that again. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: That’s right. What do you have?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO: What’s bundled with my computer?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?
ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.
COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
ABBOTT: One copy.
COSTELLO: Isn’t it illegal to copy money?
ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!
A FEW DAYS LATER . . .
ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?
ABBOTT: Click on “START”…….

If you could go back in time to 1980 and tell everyone that in 25 years, European governments would be spearheading an initiative called “Operation Spam Zombies“, and that this name was not in any way meant to be humorous, the looks on peoples faces would be priceless.