[Quote:]

This hand crafted plush toy will not only look wonderfully great on yer cube desk or mantle but one touch to His noodly appendage will ensure ye direct and speedy access to the heaven of the Flying Spaghetti Monster upon yer death.* Ye will bask in the glory of the beer volcano and enjoy the convince of the adjacent stripper factory.

Not only will yer bid benefit ye in the afterlife, but it will benefit the National Center for Science Education right away. All of the proceeds from the auction will be donated, and for a limited time, if ye bid before the end of the auction, I’ll take advantage of the donation matching provided by my employer. 200% of the bounty will be donated up to 1000 gallions (a.k.a. USD) matching.

YARR!!

* Afterlife in any religion not guaranteed.