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I’d like to order a vowel, please

Posted on July 22nd, 2014 at 11:04 by John Sinteur in category: Funny!

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Cartoons

Posted on July 22nd, 2014 at 9:03 by John Sinteur in category: Cartoon


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English?

Posted on July 19th, 2014 at 23:08 by John Sinteur in category: Funny!

Learn It


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Comments:

  1. Exhortations to learn IT and to not excrete in public are perfectly sensible.

Verizon made an enemy tonight

Posted on July 18th, 2014 at 18:00 by John Sinteur in category: ¿ʞɔnɟ ǝɥʇ ʇɐɥʍ

[Quote]:

On a flight back to New York I read Level 3’s assessment of the latest round of the Netflix vs Internet Provider debacle.

The summarized version is that basically Netflix is slow because Verizon refuses to add capacity to peer with Level 3. Fixing the situation would cost Verizon on the order of a few thousand (that’s right thousand) dollars. Level 3 is even willing to foot the bill. But Verizon refuses.


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Careful, this could get Messi

Posted on July 15th, 2014 at 10:36 by John Sinteur in category: Funny!

O8mjQub


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Cartoons

Posted on July 14th, 2014 at 15:48 by John Sinteur in category: Cartoon


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Brave!

Posted on July 3rd, 2014 at 20:27 by John Sinteur in category: Joke

Three generals, one from the Army, another from the Marines, and a third from the Air Force, were having a debate with a Navy Admiral about whose soldiers were the bravest.

To prove his point, the Air Force general calls over an airman. “Airman! Climb that flagpole, and once you are at the top, sing ‘Wild Blue Yonder’, and then jump off!” “YES SIR!” replies the airman. He takes off for the flagpole like a shot, scales up it, sings the anthem, salutes and jumps off, hitting the ground at attention.

The general dismisses him. “Now that’s bravery!” exclaims the general.

“Ah, that’s nothing” says the Admiral “Seaman!” A seaman appears “YES, SIR!!” “Take this weapon” as he offers him an M14 “Scale that flagpole, balance yourself on top, stand at attention, present arms, and sing ‘Anchors Aweigh.’ Salute each of us, and jump off. “YES SIR!” replies the seaman. He sprints for the flagpole with the weapon high over his head, and completes the task perfectly.

“Now that’s courage!” says the admiral.

“You want courage!?” snorts the Army general. “Get over here, private!” “YES SIR!” replies the private. “Put on full combat gear, load your rucksack with these rocks, scale that flagpole, come to attention, present arms, and sing the National Anthem, salute each of us, and then climb back down, head first”. “YES SIR!!” replies the private, and completes the task.

“Now that is a brave man! Beat that!!” They all look to the Marine. “Private” he says. “YES SIR!” “Put on full combat gear. Put these two dogs in your pack. Using only one hand, climb that flagpole. At the top, sing ‘The Halls of Montezuma’, put your knife in your teeth, and dive off, headfirst”. The private snaps to attention, looks at the general and says “FUCK YOU SIR!”

The general turns to the others and says “Now THAT’S bravery!”


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Cartoons

Posted on July 2nd, 2014 at 17:12 by John Sinteur in category: Cartoon


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Cartoons

Posted on June 30th, 2014 at 17:44 by John Sinteur in category: Cartoon


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Massachusetts SWAT teams claim they’re private corporations, immune from open records laws

Posted on June 28th, 2014 at 22:57 by John Sinteur in category: ¿ʞɔnɟ ǝɥʇ ʇɐɥʍ

[Quote]:

As part of the American Civil Liberties Union’s recent report on police militarization, the Massachusetts chapter of the organization sent open records requests to SWAT teams across that state. It received an interesting response.


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He got served!

Posted on June 26th, 2014 at 11:20 by John Sinteur in category: Funny!

RpwJAO7


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Shoes

Posted on June 26th, 2014 at 8:45 by John Sinteur in category: Funny!

7bTqm19


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Wipe clean with a relaxed hamster

Posted on June 14th, 2014 at 16:50 by John Sinteur in category: ¿ʞɔnɟ ǝɥʇ ʇɐɥʍ

Beurer Digital Body Analysis Scale with Glass Platform


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Comments:

  1. Does the hamster come with the scale or do we have to provide our own, in which case can I use a dead hamster, as they are much easier to come by.

Trigger warning: Child Abuse

Posted on June 11th, 2014 at 21:06 by John Sinteur in category: ¿ʞɔnɟ ǝɥʇ ʇɐɥʍ

[Quote]:

Marion Zimmer Bradley, award-winning author (The Mists of Avalon, Darkover, amongst others) not only aided and abetted her husband in child abuse (Walter Breen, a man who was first convicted in 1954), she also took part in it, according to an email from her daughter published yesterday.


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Secret terror trial is threat to open justice, human rights campaigners warn

Posted on June 5th, 2014 at 23:55 by John Sinteur in category: ¿ʞɔnɟ ǝɥʇ ʇɐɥʍ

[Quote]:

A major criminal trial involving two men charged with serious terrorism offences could be held entirely in secret for the first time in modern British legal history.

Lawyers contesting the decision at the court of appeal on Wednesday said the plan amounted to “an unprecedented departure from the principles of open justice” and was “inconsistent with democracy and the rule of law”.

Until now it has not even been possible to report the existence of the forthcoming trial against the two men, known only as AB and CD. But three appeal court judges lifted a gagging order allowing reporting of a hearing challenging the plans.

The trial would be the first criminal case to be held behind closed doors for hundreds of years. It involves two defendants who are charged with terrorism but whose names are being withheld from the public. Unless the appeal succeeds, journalists will be banned from being present in court to report the proceedings on 16 June or the outcome of the trial.

The men will be tried by a jury but no report of the case will be made public and no members of the media or public will be given access to the court.

Today’s “exceptional circumstances” will be tomorrow standard procedures.


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Comments:

  1. WTF, indeed!

    I mean, apart from the insult to the fundamental principles of justice and liberty that the Greatest Generation fought for on the beaches three score and ten years ago etc. etc…I am unsuccessful in trying to come up with motivations that the Authorities have to do this in such secrecy.

  2. Evil always fear the light of day.

Matthew 27:24

Posted on June 3rd, 2014 at 20:30 by John Sinteur in category: ¿ʞɔnɟ ǝɥʇ ʇɐɥʍ, batshitinsane, Pastafarian News

[Quote]:

“How do we determine when a priest is and is not on duty?” one of the justices asked, according to a video of the session on the court’s website.

“Well,” replied the diocese lawyer, “you can determine a priest is not on duty when he is molesting a child, for example. …


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Cartoons

Posted on June 1st, 2014 at 9:42 by John Sinteur in category: Cartoon


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Cartoons

Posted on May 28th, 2014 at 10:18 by John Sinteur in category: Cartoon


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Not Invited

Posted on May 27th, 2014 at 20:25 by Paul Jay in category: awesome, Funny!, Joke

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Comments:

  1. I can just imagine R.R. Martin at the next wedding he goes to. He turns to the person sitting next to him and whispers that he’s ‘arranged a surprise’ for the Bride & Groom.

    And five minutes later, he’s the only person in the room and you can just hear the sounds of the stampede off in the distance as everyone bolts for the horizon…

  2. This wedding was all about green.

Solar Panels Drain the Sun’s Energy, Experts Say

Posted on May 24th, 2014 at 8:06 by Desiato in category: Can you Trump this?, Funny!

[Quote]:

Scientists at the Wyoming Institute of Technology, a privately-owned think tank located in Cheyenne, Wyoming, discovered that energy radiated from the sun isn’t merely captured in solar panels, but that energy is directly physically drawn from the sun by those panels, in a process they refer to as “forced photovoltaic drainage.”

(…)

The study was commissioned in August 2011 by the Halliburton corporation, who wanted to learn if the energy giant should start manufacturing and selling solar panels domestically and internationally. Halliburton’s executives wanted to know more about the sustainability of solar energy and how photovoltaic technology might evolve over the next ten years. But based on the findings of WIT’s research in the field, Halliburton revealed on Friday that they will not be entering the solar energy market.

“Solar panels destroying the sun could potentially be the worst man-made climate disaster in the history of the world, and Halliburton will not be taking part in that,” the company stated in a press release issued Friday morning. “It’s obvious, based on the findings of this neutral scientific research group, that humans needs to become more dependent on fossil fuels like oil and coal, not less. Because these so-called `green technologies’ are far more dangerous to the Earth than any hydrofracking operation or deep-water drilling station. What good is clean air when our very sun is no longer functional?”

The Onion, move over!


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Comments:

  1. The site that ran the story doesn’t seem to be a satire site like the Onion. It’s full of crazy stories (Obama running for a third term?) but it seems to take it seriously.
    In short, it’ll quickly become the go-to site for Right-wingers…

    Draining the sun indeed…

  2. I suspect that in the case of this place, “think tank” is a misnomer.

  3. Experts? Expert at what, generating nonsensical reports about stuff they are totally incompetent at? “If only I had a drain…” – or is that “brain”?

  4. @Spaceman: Experts at draining money out of rich twits. Pretty good work if you can get it.

  5. Subtlety makes for good satire.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/National_Report

  6. Come on: Wyoming Institute of Technology WIT – pronounced “whit”

Cartoons

Posted on May 23rd, 2014 at 17:13 by John Sinteur in category: Cartoon


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Joke

Posted on May 22nd, 2014 at 13:16 by John Sinteur in category: Funny!

One Sunday a pastor told his congregation that the church needed some extra money and asked the people to prayerfully consider giving a little extra in the offering plate. He said that whoever gave the most would be able to pick out three hymns.

After the offering plates were passed, the pastor glanced down and noticed that someone had placed a $1,000 wad in offering. He was so excited that he immediately shared his joy with his congregation and said he’d like to personally thank the person who placed the money in the plate.

A very quiet, elderly, saintly lady all the way in the back shyly raised her hand. The pastor asked her to come to the front. Slowly she made her way to the pastor. He told her how wonderful it was that she gave so much and in thanksgiving asked her to pick out three hymns.

Her eyes brightened as she looked over the congregation, pointed to the three handsomest men in the building and said “I’ll take him and him and him!”


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Comments:

  1. Old ladies like me want young men for only one thing:

    gardening chores.

  2. @SueW — well, I am glad to got to the *root of the issue :-)

Spoiler

Posted on May 17th, 2014 at 15:36 by John Sinteur in category: Funny!

Screen Shot 2014-05-17 at 15.34.02


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Comments:

  1. Typical Madison, Wisconsin smart alec!

  2. A friend who trained as an aeronautical engineer has always told me that a spoiler on the rear of a vehicle has no aerodynamic effect.

Far Side: Car!

Posted on May 17th, 2014 at 15:07 by John Sinteur in category: Funny!

P4GkAqR


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Progress

Posted on May 16th, 2014 at 19:52 by John Sinteur in category: Funny!

TrNtjxK


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Nice rant

Posted on May 15th, 2014 at 8:34 by John Sinteur in category: Funny!


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Elmer Fudd’s midwife cwisis.

Posted on May 13th, 2014 at 16:47 by John Sinteur in category: Funny!

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Cartoons

Posted on May 13th, 2014 at 9:31 by John Sinteur in category: Cartoon


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husk at stemme den 25. maj

Posted on May 12th, 2014 at 20:27 by John Sinteur in category: ¿ʞɔnɟ ǝɥʇ ʇɐɥʍ


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T-shirt

Posted on May 11th, 2014 at 18:44 by John Sinteur in category: Funny!

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