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Solar Panels Drain the Sun’s Energy, Experts Say

Posted on May 24th, 2014 at 8:06 by Desiato in category: Can you Trump this?, Funny!

[Quote]:

Scientists at the Wyoming Institute of Technology, a privately-owned think tank located in Cheyenne, Wyoming, discovered that energy radiated from the sun isn’t merely captured in solar panels, but that energy is directly physically drawn from the sun by those panels, in a process they refer to as “forced photovoltaic drainage.”

(…)

The study was commissioned in August 2011 by the Halliburton corporation, who wanted to learn if the energy giant should start manufacturing and selling solar panels domestically and internationally. Halliburton’s executives wanted to know more about the sustainability of solar energy and how photovoltaic technology might evolve over the next ten years. But based on the findings of WIT’s research in the field, Halliburton revealed on Friday that they will not be entering the solar energy market.

“Solar panels destroying the sun could potentially be the worst man-made climate disaster in the history of the world, and Halliburton will not be taking part in that,” the company stated in a press release issued Friday morning. “It’s obvious, based on the findings of this neutral scientific research group, that humans needs to become more dependent on fossil fuels like oil and coal, not less. Because these so-called `green technologies’ are far more dangerous to the Earth than any hydrofracking operation or deep-water drilling station. What good is clean air when our very sun is no longer functional?”

The Onion, move over!


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Comments:

  1. The site that ran the story doesn’t seem to be a satire site like the Onion. It’s full of crazy stories (Obama running for a third term?) but it seems to take it seriously.
    In short, it’ll quickly become the go-to site for Right-wingers…

    Draining the sun indeed…

  2. I suspect that in the case of this place, “think tank” is a misnomer.

  3. Experts? Expert at what, generating nonsensical reports about stuff they are totally incompetent at? “If only I had a drain…” – or is that “brain”?

  4. @Spaceman: Experts at draining money out of rich twits. Pretty good work if you can get it.

  5. Subtlety makes for good satire.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/National_Report

  6. Come on: Wyoming Institute of Technology WIT – pronounced “whit”

American Crossroads: “Sack It”

Posted on November 6th, 2012 at 18:45 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?

As she watches the President from her tablet, kitchen television, and sits comfortably in her expensive home…. But to be fair, this is probably the poorest woman that Mitt Romney would agree to be associated with. I mean really, is that only a 19″ flatscreen in her Kitchen? For shame.


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  1. Saw this add for the first time on Monday night.

    Nice to see the whole “Didn’t clean up Bush and Cheney’s shambles soon enough for me” angle didn’t work nearly as much as Obama is a Nazi Coummunist Muslim Martian. State district maps like South Carolina showed that clearly: the farther out into backwoods bumcluck land you got the reader the map became.

Romney to Business Crowd: Obama Sees You As an “Evil”

Posted on October 29th, 2012 at 17:47 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?, Indecision 2012

[Quote]:

Ever since I revealed Mitt Romney’s 47 percent rant, tips and tapes have come through the transom—including this and this. And another source who asked not to be identified just sent me an audio recording of a private Mitt Romney fundraiser from earlier this year. At this event, Romney didn’t decry half of the nation, but he and Ann Romney each expressed disdain for President Barack Obama, with the Republican presidential candidate asserting that Obama considers businesspeople “a necessary evil” and his wife suggesting that the president was not a “grown-up.”


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DNC slams Romney’s Mourdock endorsement

Posted on October 24th, 2012 at 14:05 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Can you Trump this?, Indecision 2012


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  1. The logic is really insane. Rape is a violent act. Pregnancy from rape is a gift from god per Mourdock. If I extend this logic(ok a little stretch), murder during rape is also a gift from god, as he that ‘giveth’ life can also ‘taketh’ it away. But more to my point, what type of god would choose to give life via a rape? No god I ever want to know. I try to avoid crazy beings and this god as described passes the crazy test.

  2. I can only wish God’s blessings on Romney and Mourdock.

Debate

Posted on October 23rd, 2012 at 15:03 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?, Indecision 2012

You probably all heard this one during the debate:

[Quote]:

“You mention the Navy, for example, and that we have fewer ships than we did in 1916. Well governor, we also have fewer horses and bayonets,” Obama said during the final presidential debate. “We have these things called aircraft carriers and planes land on them. We have these ships that go underwater, nuclear submarines.”

Well, the Obama campaign registered http://cavalrymenforromney.com/ today…


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Comments:

  1. Cavalry vs. bayonets: Kinder, gentler warfare, by gentlemen against peasants?

  2. Next, I’ll bet Romney will be claiming he has saved the buggy whip industry from Chinese encroachment! Or is that encoachment?… :-)

Mitt Romney supporter

Posted on October 13th, 2012 at 15:30 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?, Indecision 2012


[Quote]:

LANCASTER, OH – OCTOBER 12: A supporter of Republican presidential candidate, former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney and Republican vice presidential candidate U.S. Rep. Paul Ryan (R-WI) waits for a campaign event to begin on October 12, 2012 in Lancaster, Ohio. Ryan debated U.S. Vice President Joe Biden the evening before and Romney is scheduled to debate U.S. President Barack Obama for the second time on October 16. (Photo by Jamie Sabau/Getty Images)


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Big Bird

Posted on October 9th, 2012 at 19:05 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?, Indecision 2012


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  1. Enjoy while it lasts:

    [Quote]:

    “Sesame Workshop is a nonpartisan, nonprofit organization and we do not endorse candidates or participate in political campaigns,” a Tuesday statement on Sesameworkshop.org reads. “We have approved no campaign ads, and as is our general practice, have requested that the ad be taken down.”

  2. Say what you will about the propriety of the ad itself, but it’s not often that a political ad can actually make me laugh…

Vote for Mitt Romney

Posted on October 9th, 2012 at 17:37 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?, Indecision 2012

You may remember this chap from here – you remember, the guy who see penises everywhere…


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  1. I have a dream…that one day, singing that a person is gay will be a compliment…

Empty chair ‘lynchings’: Anti-Obama protests gone too far?

Posted on September 21st, 2012 at 0:15 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?, Indecision 2012

[Quote]:

“He replied, and I quote, “I don’t really give a damn whether it disturbs you or not. You can take [your concerns] and go straight to hell and take Obama with you. I don’t give a [expletive]. If you don’t like it, don’t come down my street.”


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  1. A true Southern gentleman, I’d say.

No government here…

Posted on August 5th, 2012 at 15:30 by Desiato in category: ¿ʞɔnɟ ǝɥʇ ʇɐɥʍ, Can you Trump this?, Foyer of Ennui (just short of the Hall of Shame), Indecision 2012

[Quote:]

No Government here


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Romney’s Fail Parade Continues: Praises Poland For All the Wrong Reasons

Posted on August 2nd, 2012 at 17:24 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?

[Quote]:

“Rather than heeding the false promise of a government-dominated economy, Poland sought to stimulate innovation, attract investment, expand trade, and live within its means,” Romney said in a speech in Warsaw. “Your success today is a reminder that the principles of free enterprise can propel an economy and transform a society.”

[..]

 Like with many things Romney says, he  managed to neglect several, slightly important little details about Poland. Details such as:

-  The government provides families with $300 for every baby Polish mommies pop out.
-  The government fully funds State university education.
-  Poland has government expenditure as a percentage of GDP being 44%, as opposed to 41% in the U.S.
- Oh, and Poland also has universal health care.


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Birthers want proof that Mitt Romney was born in America

Posted on April 10th, 2012 at 15:51 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?, Indecision 2012

[Quote]:

No, you read that right. You might think birthers are crazy conspiracy theorists, but you can’t say they’re inconsistent. The fringe group of politicians and concerned voters who have long dogged President Obama for “proof” that he is a natural born citizen are now targeting Mitt Romney. They demand that the California Secretary of State produce evidence that Mitt is eligible to run for president. One birther explains that Romney’s citizenship is up for debate because his dad was born in Mexico. Thats right, Mitt Romney’s father was born in the Mexican colony that Mitt’s great-grandfather founded after fleeing the United States so he could stay married to Romney’s four great-grandmothers. Let’s all just let that sink in for a moment.


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Comments:

  1. Wow. If all four of the wives of Mitt’s great-grandfather were also his great-grandmothers… yeah, wait, I need to let that sink in.

  2. An accident with a contraceptive and a time machine, perhaps?

  3. Not much resemblance between Mitt and the big Z. I can think of several scenarios that don’t require a time machine.

  4. Having two heads might explain the policy changes, though.

  5. Mitt Romney’s Mexican father, hmmmmm…….Are the simple minded “BIRTHERS”, going to ask Romney for his birth certificate? We all know this was never about a birth certificate, if it was then these same people would be asking Romney for his. It’s about small minded people who hate African Americans and do not have the brains to review a President’s policy so they make something up. Could he be the first Anchor Baby?

    Lets be clear none of these dullards have won a case in the “U.S. Courts”, maybe in their simple minds (if they have any) but not in our “U.S. Courts”, so unless Birthers/ teabaggers, whatever you want to be called, win a court case, “We The People” will continue to see as dullards, liars or racist or maybe all three. Deal with that baby!

Why Santorum is The One

Posted on March 18th, 2012 at 18:41 by Desiato in category: awesome, ¿ʞɔnɟ ǝɥʇ ʇɐɥʍ, Can you Trump this?, Funny!, Indecision 2012, News, What were they thinking?

[Quote]:

[Santorum:] "People ask me why I am the best candidate to run against Barack Obama. I feel like in many respects like I am running against Barack Obama here in this primary because Mitt Romney has the same positions as Barack Obama in this primary," Santorum said Saturday in Effingham, Ill.

Obama and Romney are basically the same, and I’m losing against Romney, so you should pick me to run against Obama!

Logic that cannot be denied.


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Comments:

  1. Every time I think “this is it, he has gone full retard”, a few days later something like this happens and he manages to top his previous statements…

  2. Admit it, we all thought Idiocracy was a comedy not a horror flick…

  3. unless you include the fact that he really thinks he is winning.

Did Perry Overstate Budget Cut?

Posted on December 18th, 2011 at 11:34 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?

[Quote]:

As he discussed his plans on Saturday to remake Washington, Rick Perry pledged that he would put forward a budget that cut $5 trillion from the one President Obama has offered, in part by eliminating or downsizing congressional agencies.

That’s a bit of a tall order. Obama’s proposed FY2012 budget is $3.7 trillion.


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  1. It’s become commonplace to cite the 10-year savings from policy changes. This isn’t remarkable.

Oops: Rick Perry forgets name of Supreme Court justice

Posted on December 10th, 2011 at 14:48 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?, Indecision 2012

[Quote]:

In what is becoming a pattern for the struggling Texas governor, Mr Perry appeared to simply blank on the name of Justice Sonya Sotomayor, who he was trying to denounce as a collaborator in what he describes as President Barack Obama’s "war on religion".

"When you see his appointment of two, from my perspective, inarguably activist judges, whether it was…" Mr Perry began before trailing off and sitting silent for six seconds.

"Not Montemayor," he said before the name was finally supplied to him by a reporter from the Des Moines Register, the paper with which he was doing an editorial board interview.


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Bachmann: I Would Close Our (Non-Existent) Embassy In Iran

Posted on December 1st, 2011 at 11:52 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?

[Quote]:

Michele Bachmann has had her fair share of foreign policy stumbles, but she just hit a whole new level.

According to a tweet from NBC News’ Jamie Novogrod, Bachmann responded to the recent raiding of the British embassy in Iran, by saying that if she was President, she would close down the U.S. embassy there.

There’s just one problem: The U.S. has not had an embassy in Iran ever since the Iranian hostage crisis, when revolutionaries from the budding Islamic state held 52 Americans for 444 days.


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  1. So she’ll say that Pres. Carter did a good thing, then? The brazen pinko!

Scenes from the GOP’s “Commander in Chief” Debate | Mother Jones

Posted on November 14th, 2011 at 18:28 by Desiato in category: awesome, Can you Trump this?, Indecision 2012, What were they thinking?

[Quote]:

What would I cut? I think, really, what I would want to do is be able to go back and take a look at Lyndon Baines Johnson’s The Great Society. The Great Society has not worked, and it’s put us into the modern welfare state. If you look at China, they don’t have food stamps. If you look at China, they save for their own retirement security. They don’t have pay FICA. They don’t have the modern welfare state. And China’s growing. And so what I would do is look at the programs that LBJ gave us with The Great Society, and they’d be gone.

A Republican candidate for President suggests the U.S. take hints for domestic policy from a Communist country.


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Me Lover’s Pizza With Crazy Broad

Posted on June 2nd, 2011 at 18:25 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?, Funny!

The Daily Show – Me Lover’s Pizza With Crazy Broad
Tags: Daily Show Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,The Daily Show on Facebook


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  1. And if you live in the UK, you get this message instead: “Dear Great Britain (inaccurate but always appreciated), we’re terribly sorry but full episodes and video clips of the Daily Show with Jon Stewart are not available. But please don’t send any Red Coats in retailiation at this time, as you CAN get your headlines at Channel 4.” – Jolly decent of them, I say.

Trump says public scorn greater than he expected

Posted on May 12th, 2011 at 11:28 by John Sinteur in category: Boo hoo poor you, Can you Trump this?, Indecision 2012

[Quote]:

Real estate magnate Donald Trump suggested Wednesday it’s not much fun flirting with the idea of running for president in the face of relentless attacks and ridicule.

“Nobody said it was going to be easy, but I had no idea I would get hammered in the way I’ve been hammered the past few weeks,” Trump said in Nashua, New Hampshire.


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  1. Translation: I can dish it out but it is hard on the receiving end.

  2. Makes you wonder how Obama has felt with all these people questioning his citizenship, faith, and patriotism for the past three years…

John McCain follows Obama’s lead, releases original long-form Birth Certificate

Posted on April 28th, 2011 at 10:45 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?


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  1. Hey – you can’t pull the wool over my eyes that easily. CLEARLY the attending shamans name was impressed with a bamboo stylus and it’s common knowledge that those were NOT used in Mesopotamia until at least 400 years after the indicated birth date on this tablet. I demand to know the REAL truth about McCain’s origins!

  2. OK, you got me!

Trump

Posted on April 28th, 2011 at 10:22 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?


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Afterbirthers Demand To See Obama’s Placenta

Posted on April 27th, 2011 at 18:40 by Paul Jay in category: Can you Trump this?

[Quote]:

WASHINGTON–In the continuing controversy surrounding the president’s U.S. citizenship, a new fringe group informally known as “Afterbirthers” demanded Monday the authentication of Barack Obama’s placenta from his time inside his mother’s womb. “All we are asking is that the president produce a sample of his fetal membranes and vessels—preferably along with a photo of the crowning and delivery—and this will all be over,” said former presidential candidate and Afterbirthers spokesman Alan Keyes, later adding that his organization would be willing to settle for a half-liter of maternal cord plasma. “To this day, the American people have not seen a cervical mucus plug, let alone one that has been signed and notarized by a state-certified Hawaiian health official. If the president was indeed born in the manner in which he claims, then where is his gestation sac?” Keyes said that if Obama did not soon produce at least a bloody bedsheet from his conception, Afterbirthers would push forward with efforts to exhume the president’s deceased mother and inspect the corpse’s pelvic bone and birth canal


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I wonder…

Posted on April 27th, 2011 at 17:02 by John Sinteur in category: Can you Trump this?

… how long it will take before the right wing denies that the released birth certificate isn’t real.

Oh, wait:


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Comments:

  1. Can you Trump this?

  2. ‘Can you Trump this’ might be a good new category for the site?

  3. done.

  4. So Mr. Obama has now descended to mud wrassling in the snake pit with all the charlatans and fakirs. He’s just an American after all.