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The real agenda for the forced-birth March for Life crowd in one creepy tweet

Posted on January 23rd, 2015 at 19:57 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


Those tramps. Those harlots. The trollops. Those long lean thighs….

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  1. Yoga pants! It’s like two hardboiled eggs in a bag, I tell ya!

Should human rights always outweigh religious rights?

Posted on January 17th, 2015 at 18:27 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News

The mental gymnastics that are needed to reach the conclusions of most religious folk in that debate/dialogue is maddening. They want the right to wear a hijab but deny the right to wear a t-shirt, and they utterly fail to see the problem..

Majid Nawaz even got death threats for saying that he was not offended.

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  1. Human rights MUST prevail! All religions disagree just about everything, so which is going to prevail? As far as I’m concerned, religions and religious demonstrations should be banned in public. Let people practice in private whatever/however they want, but LEAVE ME OUT OF YOUR CRAP!

  2. And, it’s about time the US government gets off the fence. There is no middle ground! Quit doing business with dictators and royal pain in the asses.

  3. “Inalienable human rights”. What do they not fucking get?

  4. Agree. Why is their even a debate? Reason: Education failure; Religious indoctrination. Organized religions are like mafias, actually worse, and should be treated as such. As Spaceman said, practice in private and keep it out of politics and law.

  5. Best of friends, a Christian, a Muslim, a Jew, a Buddhist, an agnostic and an atheist walked into their local, The Garden of Eden.

    After many rounds of drinks a fight started (it was the agnostic’s round, although he claimed it wasn’t because the Muslim was only drinking Coke).

    Observing the chaos, the publican loudly rang the closing bell – the fighters stopped and stared at him.

    The publican said, “I created the world in seven days and now I hafta deal with this! You’re all barred! Get out!”

    There was a wailing and a gnashing of teeth. Sorrowing, they went on their way.

  6. Sue, maybe if he had taken a little more time?

‘Boy Who Came Back From Heaven’ going back to publisher

Posted on January 16th, 2015 at 10:59 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


Tyndale House, a major Christian publisher, has announced that it will stop selling “The Boy Who Came Back From Heaven,” by Alex Malarkey and his father, Kevin Malarkey.

The best-selling book, first published in 2010, describes what Alex experienced while he lay in a coma after a car accident when he was 6 years old. The coma lasted two months, and his injuries left him paralyzed, but the subsequent spiritual memoir — with its assuring description of “Miracles, Angels, and Life beyond This World” — became part of a popular genre of “heavenly tourism,” which has been controversial among orthodox Christians.

Earlier this week, Alex recanted his testimony about the afterlife. In an open letter to Christian bookstores posted on the Pulpit and Pen Web site, Alex states flatly: “I did not die. I did not go to Heaven.”

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  1. Another fraud based on religion. Shocking. I’m glad I can still find the truth in the Bible and Koran (snark).

  2. I was going to ask whether he would be giving the money back. Then I read that he wasn’t receiving money from the book and it became clear that the christian publishing industry is just as exploitative as any 3rd world sweatshop.

  3. I just noted one thing: Malarkey!

  4. Gareth, they’ve been ripping off GOD for over 2,000 years. Imagine what his royalties would have been.

Pope Francis on Freedom of Speech: ‘One Cannot Make Fun of Faith’

Posted on January 15th, 2015 at 19:50 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


Pope Francis suggested there are limits to freedom of expression, saying in response to the Charlie Hebdo terror attack that “one cannot make fun of faith” and that anyone who throws insults can expect a “punch.”


To illustrate his point, he joked about Vatican aide Alberto Gasparri who was standing nearby on the plane.

“It’s true that we can’t react violently, but, for example if Dr. Gasbarri here, a great friend of mine, says a curse word against my mother, then a punch awaits him,” the pontiff said.

All it really illustrates, Francis, is that you are a petty, small-minded person.

Matthew 5:39

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  1. Wait, Francis, a punch is a non violent act. Another f_cking hypocritical religious asshole.

  2. Previous Pontiffs have done more global harm in fewer words while staying on-message – Francis’s previous statements have made it clear that he cares more about people than about purity of faith.

    Here, he seems to be saying that it’s human nature to react violently to a perceived attack on something held dear. It was likely intended as a caution against blasphemy just to annoy others, like shouting “FIRE!” in a crowded cathedral. It’s a pity that he didn’t take it a step further to say that the moral response is to seek reconciliation rather than recompense: instead, he presented a parable in which he (the Pope!) would commit violence. Given that he’s held to be infallible, that’s implicitly preaching violence.

    Okay, suddenly I agree with Mykolas. :-(

  3. I believe that we not only have the right to mock some things that people believe but we also have an obligation to do so.

    So the pope has violated my beliefs by saying that we don’t have that right. Does that give me the right to punch him in the face?

  4. Alright, that punching bit is a really odd thing for this Pope to say. Odd enough to make you wonder if it was translated right.

    Now I know this Pope isn’t perfect and I know he hasn’t acted on the child abuse issues in the way we would hope. But John, the way you seem determined to find fault with this otherwise remarkable character actually makes *you* look petty and small-minded. Look at the big picture. Look at the direction of change.

  5. What direction? No Catholic doctrine changed: attitude towards important stuff like women’s rights, contraception condoms, homosexuality, nothing is changing at all. All I see is a lot of slick PR, and in this particular interview he showed how shallow he really is.

  6. “Religion is an idea, and, as an idea, it should be eligible for criticism, discussion, and yes, mockery. The only reason so many believers demand special exceptions be made for religious ideas is because they know full well that their ideas don’t hold up well under scrutiny.

    -Amanda Marcotte

    Draw your conclusions on what the pope really believes….

  7. I’m more than willing to concede that this pope is better than his predecessor, in kind of the same way that an E. coli infection is better than an E. coli infection and accidentally chopping off your hand with a chainsaw.

  8. @Mudak: There are E. coli and then there are E. coli that can kill you.

    Ol’ Frankie there is a Jesuit. I seem to think they don’t do turning the other cheek (except for that terrible joke about altar boys).

  9. I gotta say, the new comments about “breeding like rabbits” are awkward but the B.S. about “outside [i.e. non-religions socially progressive] groups should not meddle in people’s values” stuff is so hypocritical from a Jesuit that it made my head kersplode.

  10. @Desiato: If I want to persuade his customers to join my entertainment complex and he forbids them to (on pain of eternal penalty payments) isn’t that anti-competitive behaviour? Can I take him to the WTO?

Saudi cleric condemns …….. as anti-Islamic

Posted on January 12th, 2015 at 15:33 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News

Is it A) terrorism; B) child marriage; or C) building snowmen for fun?

Check your guess here.

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Pastor brags about punching ‘dangerously bright’ kid

Posted on January 11th, 2015 at 9:54 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News

Yeah, because anyone who isn’t following YOUR god exactly deserves “whatever happens to them” right? Including anything any religious person feels like doing to them.

Reminds me of Paris somehow…

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  1. An admission of assault? Proud of it? Nice.

    I do agree with this flock herder about one thing. Smart is dangerous to his type.

No minimum age for marriage of girls

Posted on January 3rd, 2015 at 12:24 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


Saudi Arabia’s religious leader, Sheikh Abdulaziz Al Asheikh, has said that he does not plan to restrict the minimum age for marriage for women to 15 years, contravening a recent proposal from the country’s Ministry of Justice.

In an interview with the Al Riyadh, reported by the Saudi Gazette, the Grand Mufti described the marriage of girls below that age as “permissible”.

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  1. Dress-wearing old geezers’ views on sex, marriage, women (or anything else) is defined as “religion”.

  2. If Mohammed did it, it must be OK.

  3. @chas WWMD?

Death of Leelah Alcorn

Posted on December 31st, 2014 at 9:14 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


If you are reading this, it means that I have committed suicide and obviously failed to delete this post from my queue.

Please don’t be sad, it’s for the better. The life I would’ve lived isn’t worth living in … because I’m transgender. I could go into detail explaining why I feel that way, but this note is probably going to be lengthy enough as it is. To put it simply, I feel like a girl trapped in a boy’s body, and I’ve felt that way ever since I was 4. I never knew there was a word for that feeling, nor was it possible for a boy to become a girl, so I never told anyone and I just continued to do traditionally “boyish” things to try to fit in.

When I was 14, I learned what transgender meant and cried of happiness. After 10 years of confusion I finally understood who I was. I immediately told my mom, and she reacted extremely negatively, telling me that it was a phase, that I would never truly be a girl, that God doesn’t make mistakes, that I am wrong. If you are reading this, parents, please don’t tell this to your kids. Even if you are Christian or are against transgender people don’t ever say that to someone, especially your kid. That won’t do anything but make them hate them self. That’s exactly what it did to me.

My mom started taking me to a therapist, but would only take me to christian therapists, (who were all very biased) so I never actually got the therapy I needed to cure me of my depression. I only got more christians telling me that I was selfish and wrong and that I should look to God for help.

When I was 16 I realized that my parents would never come around, and that I would have to wait until I was 18 to start any sort of transitioning treatment, which absolutely broke my heart. The longer you wait, the harder it is to transition. I felt hopeless, that I was just going to look like a man in drag for the rest of my life. On my 16th birthday, when I didn’t receive consent from my parents to start transitioning, I cried myself to sleep.

I formed a sort of a “fuck you” attitude towards my parents and came out as gay at school, thinking that maybe if I eased into coming out as trans it would be less of a shock. Although the reaction from my friends was positive, my parents were pissed. They felt like I was attacking their image, and that I was an embarrassment to them. They wanted me to be their perfect little straight christian boy, and that’s obviously not what I wanted.

So they took me out of public school, took away my laptop and phone, and forbid me of getting on any sort of social media, completely isolating me from my friends. This was probably the part of my life when I was the most depressed, and I’m surprised I didn’t kill myself. I was completely alone for 5 months. No friends, no support, no love. Just my parent’s disappointment and the cruelty of loneliness.

At the end of the school year, my parents finally came around and gave me my phone and let me back on social media. I was excited, I finally had my friends back. They were extremely excited to see me and talk to me, but only at first. Eventually they realized they didn’t actually give a shit about me, and I felt even lonelier than I did before. The only friends I thought I had only liked me because they saw me five times a week.

After a summer of having almost no friends plus the weight of having to think about college, save money for moving out, keep my grades up, go to church each week and feel like shit because everyone there is against everything I live for, I have decided I’ve had enough. I’m never going to transition successfully, even when I move out. I’m never going to be happy with the way I look or sound. I’m never going to have enough friends to satisfy me. I’m never going to have enough love to satisfy me. I’m never going to find a man who loves me. I’m never going to be happy. Either I live the rest of my life as a lonely man who wishes he were a woman or I live my life as a lonelier woman who hates herself. There’s no winning. There’s no way out. I’m sad enough already, I don’t need my life to get any worse. People say “it gets better” but that isn’t true in my case. It gets worse. Each day I get worse.

That’s the gist of it, that’s why I feel like killing myself. Sorry if that’s not a good enough reason for you, it’s good enough for me. As for my will, I want 100% of the things that I legally own to be sold and the money (plus my money in the bank) to be given to trans civil rights movements and support groups, I don’t give a shit which one. The only way I will rest in peace is if one day transgender people aren’t treated the way I was, they’re treated like humans, with valid feelings and human rights. Gender needs to be taught about in schools, the earlier the better. My death needs to mean something. My death needs to be counted in the number of transgender people who commit suicide this year. I want someone to look at that number and say “that’s fucked up” and fix it. Fix society. Please.


(Leelah) Josh Alcorn

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  1. It does get worse before it gets better. I am very sad that she couldn’t bear it any longer.

    “Christian” therapy sounds like abuse for an intelligent person to undergo.

‘Best Christmas gift’: 2 Indonesian families praise luck for missing doomed AirAsia flight

Posted on December 29th, 2014 at 15:20 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


Chandra Susanto, who had been planning a holiday in Singapore with his wife and three children since March, had to cancel it a day before the due date, because his father got ill.

“It was a difficult decision to make because my son Christopher was so disappointed,” Susanto told the Daily Mail Australia. “He had been looking forward to the holiday for a long time.”

Susanto has now posted a picture of his QZ8501 ticket on Facebook, praising Christ for the miraculous escape.

“Thank you, Lord Jesus. Your plan is so beautiful, our family safe from harm,” he wrote.

And Lord Jesus meanwhile says “Fuck You” to the 162 people on the plane.

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  1. Most people get to make stupid blunders privately. The gutter press specialises in this kind of sh*t – manufacturing egregious outrage at some silly person or a celebrity. Sometimes it ruins their life.

    But in the spirit of piling in let’s hope the father doesn’t die. That wouldn’t be so beautiful.

The Islamic State is failing at being a state

Posted on December 26th, 2014 at 12:27 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


The Islamic State’s vaunted exercise in state-building appears to be crumbling as living conditions deteriorate across the territories under its control, exposing the shortcomings of a group that devotes most of its energies to fighting battles and enforcing strict rules.

Services are collapsing, prices are soaring, and medicines are scarce in towns and cities across the “caliphate” proclaimed in Iraq and Syria by the Islamic State, residents say, belying the group’s boasts that it is delivering a model form of governance for Muslims.

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Jury awards ‘grave immoral sinner’ Catholic teacher $1.9 million for in vitro fertilization firing

Posted on December 22nd, 2014 at 21:12 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


Emily Herx, a language arts teacher at St. Vincent de Paul Catholic School, was notified by the Ft. Wayne Diocese that her contract for the 2011-12 school year would not be renewed because of her use of in vitro, which the diocese described as a “sin.”


The jury decided in Herx’s favor, deliberating only 5 1/2 hours before awarding her $1.75 million for emotional and physical damages, $125,000 for medical expenses, $75,000 for lost wages, and $1.00 in punitive damages. Herx’s previous salary at the school was approximately $28,000 per year.


The diocese intends to appeal the jury’s verdict to the U.S. 7th Circuit Court of Appeal, with attorney John Theisen stating the case remains an issue of religious freedom, and that exemptions in civil rights laws for religious employers should have protected the diocese from the unfavorable verdict.

“It never should have brought the case to trial,” Theisen said.

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Guess how this sentence continues…

Posted on December 21st, 2014 at 16:09 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


A US pastor who leads a church which preaches against homosexuality has been arrested for…

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  1. practicing animal husbandry?

  2. I would like it to be “being a US pastor who leads a church which preaches against homosexuality”

  3. Does it have something to do with the unexpected discharge of a concealed weapon?

  4. The first name of the pastor “Gaylard” – how cute :-) (a=o)

Deuteronomy 15:11

Posted on December 11th, 2014 at 14:10 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


Despite a significant rise in income inequality in Texas, Gov. Rick Perry (R) is arguing that it’s not something the state ought to be worried about.

“We don’t grapple with that here,” Perry told The Washington Post in a recent interview, while acknowledging that the state’s richest residents have seen the greatest spike in earnings.

“Biblically, the poor are always going to be with us in some form or fashion,” he added, an apparent reference to Mark 14:7.

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Pope Francis: ‘All Animals Go To Heaven’

Posted on December 10th, 2014 at 16:06 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


Pope Francis has declared that all animals go to heaven during his weekly audience in St. Peter’s Square.

The Pope made these remarks after he received two donkeys as early Christmas presents. During his discussion, Pope Francis quoted the apostle Paul as he comforted a child who was mourning the death of his dog.

Francis quoted Paul’s remarks as, “One day we will see our animals again in eternity of Christ. Paradise is open to all God’s creatures.”

Oh shit

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  1. Heaven must be more than knee deep in arthropods.

And their return policy is probably “Store Credit Only”

Posted on December 10th, 2014 at 16:00 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


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  1. Can’t get the money back? OK, what can we exchange for this baby?

You can see where this is going, right?

Posted on December 9th, 2014 at 10:34 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


According to its website, the Westcity Bible Baptist Church is a “family-oriented independent Bible-believing Baptist church”.

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  1. When will these asshats learn to keep their religion out of our shorts?! Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Buddhist, I don’t care! Keep your religious beliefs but don’t burden me with them… I have my own, but I don’t expect that all others will adhere to them, nor do I proselytize or try to convert others. If they want to have a rational discussion, then ok, but this crap (praying that a person commits suicide because of their sexual orientation) is just outrageous!

  2. Clearly the abuser doesn’t actually believe in the power of prayer – he had to send a nasty message. It must be so frustrating that their god isn’t striking most of the world dead.

  3. Spiff, I have the one true religion. I update it daily as requested in my daily conversations with God. Who, by the way, has a wonderful sense of humor.

Matt Inman: Jibbers Crabst

Posted on December 7th, 2014 at 16:18 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News

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  1. Love the translator!

Religiosity In Europe, The Glass Ceiling And Doctor Performance

Posted on November 19th, 2014 at 9:17 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


“One additional year of schooling reduces individuals’ propensity to pray every day by about 10 percentage points. Likewise, an additional year of full-time education reduces the propensity to attend religious services at least once a week by 10 percentage points. We also find that schooling reduces the propensity to believe in the protective power of lucky charms, and it decreases the tendency to consult horoscopes, and to take into account horoscopes in daily life.”

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  1. Toto, we are not in Kansas anymore

Religion is a great way for people with mental illness to seem normal.

Posted on November 17th, 2014 at 16:09 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


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  1. lol, if this person was trying to pass as normal, then FAIL.

    Any person, religious or otherwise would find this kooky.

  2. Normal, yup. Attaching the wooden crosses _before_ deciding what colour they should be…

  3. Are you sure he isn’t just trying to be prepared for when the vampires attack?

  4. “Religion is a great way for people with mental illness to seem normal”

    Well, so is being a rabid football fan. They actually seem more normal than this.

  5. I wonder what this picture would look like if Jesus had been killed by an M-16?

  6. Think of the other images that would follow. Congregations kneeling and praying in front of a giant M-16. Priests and nuns and all manner of godbotherers wearing tiny M-16s around their necks. Bowing and genuflecting before the M-16; blessing and comforting with the sacred M-16. Churches built in the shape of an M-16; television evangelists building swimming pools in the shape of an M-16. Etc…

  7. I have read that Christianity is unique in using an instrument of torture as its symbol. I’m sure there are other less well known/pagan religions that do something similar tho.

  8. @Michael: As to your first point, that’s because football fans believe in things that are, sort of, possible – even if they may be sadly deluded in the case of some individuals.

    As to your second point, this goes to show that “loser chic” wasn’t actually an invention of the 1990’s.

17 more Twin Cities priests ID’d as probable pedophiles

Posted on October 29th, 2014 at 22:11 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


The Twin Cities archdiocese and the law offices of Jeff Anderson issued a joint statement Thursday disclosing names of 17 priests with “substantiated” claims of sexual abuse of a minor — including four previously unknown to the public.

The names bring to 55 the number of priests deemed to have substantiated claims of child sexual abuse within the Archdiocese of St. Paul and Minneapolis.

Ten of the 17 priests have died, “but the pain they caused is very much alive,” Archbishop John Nienstedt said in a news release.

“I am profoundly saddened and sorry for the harm clergy sexual abuse has caused victims and survivors, their families and the community.”

How profoundly sorry? So profound, it took a lawsuit settlement before the names were released.

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  1. An interesting list of “disclosures” on their website:

    Most of the little biographies that I randomly clicked on, showed that these men were allowed to work in the church until death or retirement.

    To the archdiocese’s credit, the Rebort Abuse button is prominent on their website. And they tell you to go to law enforcement first…

One Ebola, Two Eboli?

Posted on October 13th, 2014 at 14:05 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


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  1. There’s that “joke” again.

    A small boy goes to confession.
    “Forgive me father, for I have sinned. I went to a brothel and had sex with three prostitutes.”
    “Whyever did you do that Johnny? Don’t you know that it’s a mortal sin?”
    “I know what it is and I want it.”
    “Don’t you know that you could go to Hell for it?”
    “I know what it is and I want it.”
    “Don’t you know that you could pick up a sexually transmitted disease?”
    “I know what it is and I want it.”
    “Whatever for? You would suffer horribly!”
    “Because if I get it, the maid will get it. If the maid gets it, my father will get it. If my father gets it, my mother will get it. If my mother gets it, the gardener will get it. And he’s the bastard I want. He killed my frog!”

Unfortunately, he’s not talking about Catholic priests

Posted on October 11th, 2014 at 10:44 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


Vatican’s top judge: Keep kids away from ‘wrong, evil’ gays for their own protection

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  1. Clearly a follower of Jesus Christ…

No, you’re not

Posted on October 11th, 2014 at 10:30 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


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  1. Way to sweep ebola under the rug.

  2. a variation on the same old crap we’ve heard about AIDS, the black death, etc.
    This never goes away. Just a Christian version of the Ghost shirt.

  3. Actually I think redemption technically happens after death, so you may not be so safe, Tile & Carpet World.

Pregnant Austrian teens in ISIS: We’ve made a huge mistake

Posted on October 10th, 2014 at 22:52 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


The teenage girls who abandoned their families in Austria to become jihadis for ISIS feel they’ve made a terrible mistake by joining the barbaric lifestyle and they want to come home.

Samra Kesinovic, 17, and Sabina Selimovic, 15, are believed to be married, pregnant and living in the Islamic State-controlled city of Raqqa in northern Syria, Central European News reports.


The change of heart is a much different tune than the note they left behind for their parents when they fled back in April, which read: “Don’t look for us. We will serve Allah — and we will die for him.”

These western girls are living with ISIS, the people who just go around beheading random westerners.

The same people beheading children who practice a different brand of their same religion and mass murder Muslims who do not agree with their brand of islam.

The same people who stone women to death for minor offenses.

And these girls are somehow able to communicate publicly about their desire to leave and how they hate ISIS now.

Yeah, right.

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Obviously he’s not well versed in taqiyya.

Posted on October 10th, 2014 at 13:05 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


Prominent member of Hizb ut-Tahrir, Wassim Doureihi, discusses the Prime Minister’s comments about extremist organisations.

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  1. Blimey! What a wonderful provocation. Just what the ratings need!

Bill Maher Isn’t the Only One Who Misunderstands Religion

Posted on October 9th, 2014 at 20:56 by Desiato in category: Pastafarian News


No religion exists in a vacuum. On the contrary, every faith is rooted in the soil in which it is planted. It is a fallacy to believe that people of faith derive their values primarily from their Scriptures. The opposite is true. People of faith insert their values into their Scriptures, reading them through the lens of their own cultural, ethnic, nationalistic and even political perspectives.

After all, scripture is meaningless without interpretation. Scripture requires a person to confront and interpret it in order for it to have any meaning. And the very act of interpreting a scripture necessarily involves bringing to it one’s own perspectives and prejudices.

The abiding nature of scripture rests not so much in its truth claims as it does in its malleability, its ability to be molded and shaped into whatever form a worshiper requires. The same Bible that commands Jews to “love your neighbor as yourself” (Leviticus 19:18) also exhorts them to “kill every man and woman, child and infant, ox and sheep, camel and donkey,” who worship any other God (1 Sam. 15:3). The same Jesus Christ who told his disciples to “turn the other cheek” (Matthew 5:39) also told them that he had “not come to bring peace but the sword” (Matthew 10:34), and that “he who does not have a sword should sell his cloak and buy one” (Luke 22:36). The same Quran that warns believers “if you kill one person it is as though you have killed all of humanity” (5:32) also commands them to “slay the idolaters wherever you find them” (9:5).

How a worshiper treats these conflicting commandments depends on the believer.

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  1. a very well written argument

  2. You have to shape the message for the audience. Hey, that politics!

  3. The real issue, then, is how susceptible we all can be to a charismatic smooth-talking con man. And far too many of their ilk are drawn to the clergy, likely because of what that profession promises. Pick a famous member of the clergy of any religion. Would we know their names absent their profession?

  4. @Mudak – Answer — no we would not. I add: The susceptibility stems from both lack of education, especially modern science and an innate fear of the unknown. Unfortunately (or fortunately) this has never happened: “I am Lazarus, come from the dead, Come back to tell you all, I shall tell you all” TS Elliot: Prufrock. If it did, well then we would be sure there is an afterlife. And Chas is correct, as the manifestation of any organized religion is politics. Why else to kill in god’s name? Is it not the same as sacrificing an animal to the gods? Ignorance of the followers, manipulation of the ignorant by the politicians (senators,clerics, priests, whatever). I hate to be cynical, but I see no hope until the human population dispenses once and for all with their various mythologies.

  5. I would like to beg to differ with your interpretation of scripture. When Jesus told his disciples ” I come not to bring peace but the sword.” He didn’t mean the sword as a metal shaft used to destroy or kill. He meant that he was bring the word of God. this was his weapon, his (sword). And the meaning of “sell your cloak and buy one”. Was for his disciples to rid themselves of things that could not protect them and to follow the word as their sword.

  6. I would like to beg to differ with your interpretation of scripture. When Jesus told his disciples ” I come not to bring peace but the sword.” He didn’t mean the sword as a metal shaft used to destroy or kill. He meant that he was bringing the word of God. this was his weapon, his (sword). And the meaning of “sell your cloak and buy one”. Was for his disciples to rid themselves of things that could not protect them and to follow the word as their sword.

  7. “He didn’t mean…”

    Yeah. There are *so many* apologetic explanations for that verse it’s almost funny. Here’s another one you see a lot: “The sword is to separate the good from the wicked, an all men are under the wrath of God until they become saved. Yet the gospel is the gospel of peace because once you become saved, you are at peace with God.”

    Of course, it’s all bullshit. In the very next verse he says that, yes, discord and violence is his goal: “For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law. And a man’s foes shall be they of his own household.”

    Not much selling of cloaks in that one.

Saudi Arabia declares all atheists are terrorists in new law to crack down on political dissidents

Posted on October 8th, 2014 at 16:05 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


Saudi Arabia has introduced a series of new laws which define atheists as terrorists, according to a report from Human Rights Watch.

In a string of royal decrees and an overarching new piece of legislation to deal with terrorism generally, the Saudi King Abdullah has clamped down on all forms of political dissent and protests that could “harm public order”.

The new laws have largely been brought in to combat the growing number of Saudis travelling to take part in the civil war in Syria, who have previously returned with newfound training and ideas about overthrowing the monarchy.

Yeah, all those atheists joining IS, it’s really a… wait, what?

If Saudi Arabia thought atheists were actually terrorists, they would donate millions to secular political groups.

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  1. Surely, we can give the Saudis credit for one thing they have more of than anyone else … transparency.

  2. @Rob: When the House of Saud falls it won’t be a laughing matter, but I did chortle a bit there :-)

  3. And we got rid of Saddam for this?

  4. Not convinced “when” is the appropriate term, Sue. Think I’d go with “if ever”.

  5. This makes sense. If the population did not believe, they could not be manipulated. And if that happened, no more House of Saud. I hope the decree backfires. And: I think it will fall someday, after the middle east emerges from the new dark ages to which it seems intent on rushing towards.

  6. Referring to enemies as atheists is just a reflex, like certain people using the terms “communist” or “socialist”.

    @Rob: I wouldn’t bet much on their ultimate survival. They may have funded (and certainly their citizens have funded) both Al Q. and IS.

    @Mykolas: We might end up in the dark too…

Catholic Church the only body ‘effectively acting to eradicate pedophilia’

Posted on October 2nd, 2014 at 23:00 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News


A former Vatican spokesman has written, against the backdrop of the house arrest of a former nuncio being investigated for abuse of minors, that the Church is the only international body acting effectively against pedophilia.

But since this deranged piece of shit also thinks house arrest “is a very important penal action,” you can safely ignore anything else he says.

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  1. What? No flagellation for the papal nuncio? Pity.

Mexican Bishop Claims Allowing Gay Couples To Marry Will Lead To Man-Dog Unions

Posted on October 1st, 2014 at 14:03 by John Sinteur in category: batshitinsane, Pastafarian News


Jose Maria de la Torre Martin, the bishop of the Diocese of Aguascalientes, Mexico, found himself in hot water after criticizing a proposed state law that seeks to allow gay and lesbian couples to marry.


The Catholic bishop claimed this week that allowing gay couples to marry will lead to “allowing a man to marry a dog and they can inherit the puppies,” according to local sources.

His obsession with bestiality says so much about him that it’s really disturbing.

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  1. One has to wonder just how many “puppies” this bonehead has…

  2. But wait, the priests love (literally) puppies, especially Hush Puppies

  3. Ruff.

Fellate Show

Posted on September 28th, 2014 at 9:38 by John Sinteur in category: Pastafarian News

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