[Quote]:

A Christian group has been banned from claiming that God can heal illnesses on its website and in leaflets.

The Advertising Standards Authority (ASA) said it had concluded that the adverts by Healing on the Streets (HOTS) – Bath, were misleading.

It said a leaflet available to download from the group’s website said: “Need Healing? God can heal today!”

It turns out Jesus never finished medical school…

[Quote]:

An official from the Roman Catholic Church says that it is “impossible” to undergo “de-baptism” as a growing number of people in Western Europe and the United States request such a process.

Jeannine Marino, program specialist for evangelization & catechesis at the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, told CP that atheists who seek to be “de-baptized” or “un-baptized” cannot technically do so.

“From the Church’s perspective, it is impossible to ‘un-baptize’ or ‘de-baptize’ someone because we believe that baptism permanently seals the person to Christ and the Church,” said Marino.

“People can stop participating in the Church, but we believe the grace of the sacrament has marked them forever.”

Marino explains that with baptism, “no matter how long they have been away from the Church” an individual “can return to the faith.”

Why is it that these fucking morons know their own doctrine so badly?

Matthew 12:31-32

[Quote]:

Several Girl Scout troops in Chantilly, Va., have been banned from meeting at a local Catholic church and a neighboring school.

St. Timothy Catholic Church said that scouts won’t be allowed to meet or wear their uniforms on church property. The edict also applies to the adjacent St. Timothy School, which enrolls students from preschool to eighth grade.

According to the Arlington Diocese, the pastor did not believe the National Girl Scouts membership to the World Association of Girl Guides & Girl Scouts aligned with the message of the church, stemming from a perceived connection between WAGGGS and Planned Parenthood.

The Girl Scout Council of the Nation’s Capital said its parent/national organization is not WAGGGS, but instead Girl Scouts of the USA, which does not have a relationship with Planned Parenthood.

Boy scouts will be allowed to continue to meet in the priests bedroom weekly.

I think most people will stick with the Imperial system, where you get twelve Disciples to one Jesus.

[Quote]:

“Radical secularism” is gaining ground in American society and poses a “grave threat” to the Catholic Church’s freedom of expression in the public square, Pope Benedict XVI told a group of U.S. bishops on Thursday (Jan. 19).

The delegation of bishops from the mid-Atlantic region, led by Washington Cardinal Donald Wuerl, is in Rome for a series of regular “ad limina” visit that occur once every five years.

Benedict said bishops must help Catholic politicians understand that it is “their personal responsibility to offer public witness to their faith,” especially regarding the respect for human life.

I don’t understand, US politicians already lie about things to get their way, are blatant hypocrites, and shelter criminals.

What other Catholic values does he want them to pick up? Wide-spread institutionalized pedophilia?

“Belief in the traditional sense, or certitude, or dogma, amounts to the grandiose delusion, ‘My current model’ — or grid, or map, or reality-tunnel — ‘contains the whole universe and will never need to be revised.’ In terms of the history of science and knowledge in general, this appears absurd and arrogant to me, and I am perpetually astonished that so many people still manage to live with such a medieval attitude.”

― Robert Anton Wilson, Cosmic Trigger via

[Quote]:

A German Catholic priest has admitted 280 counts of sexual abuse involving three boys in the past decade, saying he did not think he was doing harm.

[Quote]:

Very much more serious is the role of Joseph Ratzinger, before the church decided to make him supreme leader, in obstructing justice on a global scale. After his promotion to cardinal, he was put in charge of the so-called “Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith” (formerly known as the Inquisition). In 2001, Pope John Paul II placed this department in charge of the investigation of child rape and torture by Catholic priests. In May of that year, Ratzinger issued a confidential letter to every bishop. In it, he reminded them of the extreme gravity of a certain crime. But that crime was the reporting of the rape and torture. The accusations, intoned Ratzinger, were only treatable within the church’s own exclusive jurisdiction. Any sharing of the evidence with legal authorities or the press was utterly forbidden. Charges were to be investigated “in the most secretive way … restrained by a perpetual silence … and everyone … is to observe the strictest secret which is commonly regarded as a secret of the Holy Office … under the penalty of excommunication.” (My italics). Nobody has yet been excommunicated for the rape and torture of children, but exposing the offense could get you into serious trouble. And this is the church that warns us against moral relativism! (See, for more on this appalling document, two reports in the London Observer of April 24, 2005, by Jamie Doward.)

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The controversial exclusion of women from various settings in Israel because of pressure from ultra-Orthodox Jewish leaders reached a new level this week with a major conference on gynecological advances that is permitting only males to address the audience.

Nobody knows their way around a vagina like an ultra-orthodox jew in the middle east.

[Quote]:

During his Boxing Day sermon, the Bishop of Córdoba, Demetrio Fernández, said there was a conspiracy by the United Nations. “The Minister for Family of the Papal Government, Cardinal Antonelli, told me a few days ago in Zaragoza that UNESCO has a program for the next 20 years to make half the world population homosexual. To do this they have distinct programs, and will continue to implant the ideology that is already present in our schools.”

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Sweden now has a new, officially-recognized religion: File-sharing. The government agency, Kammarkollegiet, has finally registered the Church of Kopimism as a religious organization.

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A fight has broken out at the church built on the spot where Jesus is said to have been born.

Palestinian police stormed the basilica of the Nativity in Bethlehem after rival groups of Orthodox and Armenian clerics clashed in a row over the boundaries of their respective ancient jurisdictions inside the church.

Armed with brooms, around 100 priests and monks came to blows during the cleaning of the church in preparation for Orthodox Christmas celebrations.

The former Palestinian minister of tourism and head of the Palestinian forces in Bethlehem were slightly injured.

Administration of the church is shared by Catholic, Orthodox, and Armenian Apostolic clerics.

The relationship between these groups has often been difficult, and there have been similar scuffles in previous years over jurisdiction.

[Quote]:

“David took his men with him and went out and killed two hundred Philistines and brought back their foreskins. They counted out the full number to the king so that David might become the king’s son-in-law. Then Saul gave him his daughter Michal in marriage”

1 Samuel 18:27

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"Let us ask the Lord to help us see through the superficial glitter of this season, and to discover behind it the child in the stable in Bethlehem, so as to find true joy and true light."

[..]

The pope started off Saturday’s celebrations by lighting a peace candle in the window of his study during the unveiling of a larger-than-life nativity scene in St. Peter’s Square. The scene, at 23 feet high and 82 feet wide, is dedicated to the Virgin Mary, according to the Vatican’s news agency.

Let’s see… gold embroidered hat, diamond and ruby encrusted solid gold scepter, 23 foot tall, 82 foot wide nativity scene.

Yep. There’s plenty of superficial glitter this season..

[Quote]:

Advocaat Jan Boone heeft maandag aangifte gedaan tegen het bisdom Rotterdam.

Hij wil dat justitie het bisdom vervolgt op verdenking van het vormen van een criminele organisatie die het plegen van seksueel misbruik als oogmerk had.

Translation: dutch lawyer wants the diocese of Rotterdam prosecuted for forming a criminal organization committing sexual abuse.

He had asked the Chief Prosecutor of Rotterdam before, but that request was pushed aside for lack of substantiation. He issued the request again referring to the Friday report by the commission Deetman about sexual abuse within the Catholic Church.

[Quote]:

“There is a controversy brewing in Leesburg, VA over just what constitutes a ‘holiday display.’ The traditional creches have already been joined this year by a skeleton Santa nailed to a cross and displays put up by atheists. Members of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster are scheduled to put up their contribution this weekend.”

Stanley Caulkins, who moved to Leesburg in 1937, remembers the first time the Nativity was put up at the corner of the courthouse lawn.

Caulkins, who has owned Caulkins Jewelers in downtown Leesburg for over half a century, sees it as a valued symbol, something that should not be messed with. He went before the county board two years ago to argue that it should stay. Last week, he said that he still does not understand why the issue engenders such controversy.

“The creche is not religious,” Caulkins insisted, his voice trembling.

A depiction of the adoration of baby Jesus, attended by the three kings, is not religious?

“It is a belief symbol. You have to believe in something,” Caulkins said.

Apparently, you have to believe in whatever Mr. Caulkins believes in.

USA Today: Holiday displays dividing Va. town

Homophobic Rick Perry ad–apparently meant only for conservative corners of Iowa, but then went retroviral on YouTube. Watch it for context if you haven’t seen it yet:

I’m only posting that Rick Perry video so you’ll fully appreciate this:

What makes you think human beings are sentient and aware? There’s no evidence for it. Human beings never think for themselves, they find it too uncomfortable. For the most part, members of our species simply repeat what they are told-and become upset if they are exposed to any different view. The characteristic human trait is not awareness but conformity, and the characteristic result is religious warfare. Other animals fight for territory or food; but, uniquely in the animal kingdom, human beings fight for their ‘beliefs.’ The reason is that beliefs guide behavior which has evolutionary importance among human beings. But at a time when our behavior may well lead us to extinction, I see no reason to assume we have any awareness at all. We are stubborn, self-destructive conformists. Any other view of our species is just a self-congratulatory delusion. Next question.

– Michael Chricton via

Update: while there is a Chatswood in New Zealand, this particular one is in Australia. Thanks to the sharp reader mailing me this!

[Quote]:

Pope Benedict XVI insisted on Saturday that all of society’s institutions and not just the Catholic church must be held to "exacting" standards in their response to sex abuse of children, and defended the church’s efforts to confront the problem.

Benedict acknowledged in remarks to visiting U.S. bishops during an audience at the Vatican that pedophilia was a "scourge" for society, and that decades of scandals over clergy abusing children had left Catholics in the United States bewildered.

"It is my hope that the Church’s conscientious efforts to confront this reality will help the broader community to recognize the causes, true extent and devastating consequences of sexual abuse, and to respond effectively to this scourge which affects every level of society," he said.

"By the same token, just as the church is rightly held to exacting standards in this regard, all other institutions, without exception, should be held to the same standards," the pope said.

[..]

“No public figure talks more about child safety but does little to actually make children safer than Pope Benedict,” David Clohessy, national director of the Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests, told The Associated Press in an emailed statement.

“The pope would have us believe that this crisis is about sex abuse. It isn’t. It is about covering up sex abuse,” Clohessy said. “And while child sex crimes happen in every institution, in no institution are they ignored or concealed as consistently as in the Catholic church.”

[Quote]:

A former Council Bluffs youth pastor accused of sexually exploiting teens as he tried to help them gain "sexual purity in the eyes of God" pleaded guilty Tuesday to three charges.

Brent Girouex, 32, was initially charged with 61 counts of sexual exploitation by a counselor or therapist and 28 counts of third-degree sexual abuse related to acts he is alleged to have performed while a youth pastor with the Victory Fellowship Church.

[..]

Court documents indicated Girouex told investigators that as a youth pastor he felt it was his duty “to help (the teen) with homosexual urges by praying while he had sexual contact with him.”

[Deuteronomy 23:12-14 NIV]:

12 Designate a place outside the camp where you can go to relieve yourself. 13 As part of your equipment have something to dig with, and when you relieve yourself, dig a hole and cover up your excrement. 14 For the LORD your God moves about in your camp to protect you and to deliver your enemies to you. Your camp must be holy, so that he will not see among you anything indecent and turn away from you.

[Quote]:

Dubbed “We Are Atheism,” the campaign was launched this fall by three students at the University of Kansas.

“It’s time for us to all stand up, speak out and be counted,” said Amanda Brown, 25, one of the co-founders. “It is time for us to put up our videos and change the face of atheism. We want people to see we are normal people who have children and lives and do good in the community.”

(…)

“If the polls are correct, there are literally millions of nonbelievers in America,” said Richard Haynes, president of Atheist Nexus. “However, many atheists feel all alone. This is the primary reason we must come out of the closet. Coming out is the only way to change the public perception of nontheism.”

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At least six people have died in Britain after being told they had been healed of HIV and could stop taking their medication, Sky News has discovered.

There is evidence that evangelical churches in London, Manchester, Birmingham and Glasgow are claiming to cure HIV through God.

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Members of the Amish community in three states have been frightened by recent hair-cutting attacks in Ohio, making fearful calls to authorities and arming themselves with pepper spray and shotguns, a sheriff said.

Splitters!

[Quote]:

Men searched for valuables in the Zongo market in Cotonou, Benin, on Thursday, two days after residents say the market was destroyed by police without warning. Officials said they were making the area presentable for Pope Benedict XVI, who arrives Friday.

Whatever you do, don’t blink!

[Quote]:

The Roman Catholic Church is willing to partner with American educational institutions to educate the public about child sex abuse after the Penn State scandal, according to the head of the U.S. church.