If you are a US citizen, and you haven’t voted yet:

GO OUT AND VOTE! Right NOW! This site will still exist when you get back, and the country needs you more than this page needs you...


If you are a US citizen, and you have already voted: well done! Now GO OUT AND FIND FIVE OF YOUR FRIENDS and check if they voted. Offer to drive them to the poll if they haven’t.


If you’re not a US citizen, relax. This site will be back to normal tomorrow, or as soon as we can call the election (which may be as early as poll closing time on the east coast)


To the "youth vote"... THEY think you are lazy and undisciplined and distractible.

Prove them wrong.

Stay. The. Fuck. In. Line.

To the "African-American vote"... THEY think you are lazy and undisciplined and easy to intimidate.

Prove them wrong.

Stay. The. Fuck. In. Line.

To the "Jewish vote"... THEY think you are stupid and old and terrified of middle names.

Prove them wrong.

Stay. The. Fuck. In. Line.

To the "Latino vote"... THEY think you are racist and too busy picking their lettuce for $50 and hour.

Prove them wrong.

Stay. The. Fuck. In. Line.

To the "Hillary vote"...  THEY think you can't tell a uterus from a policy position.

Prove them wrong.

Stay. The. Fuck. In. Line.

To the "Gay vote"... many of THEM wish THEY were you, but that's another rant.

Stay the fuck in line and don't settle for a provisional ballot unless you ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO.

Provisional ballots WILL NOT be counted on election night and therefore will not be part of the "winner" narrative and since you did stay the fuck in line lets get your vote the fuck counted now.

 

And here’s a quick recap of the entire campaign: